Seeing over the horizon...

These Days...Rascal Flats...Beautiful Mess...Diamond Rio...If I Only Had a Brain...Livingston Taylor...I Miss My Friend...Darryl Worley...Hold My Hand...Hootie and the Blowfish...Shower the People You Love With Love...James Taylor and the Dixie Chicks...

I had a great day, today:):):)...

I woke up:):)...blogged:):)...got dressed:):)...went to the bank...to deposit some checks and to make sure I had enough money for another month or so:):):)...

I went downtown to get my haircut:):):)...

I bought a vegi braut and a lemonade from the hot dog vender (who I'm sure kept all the change from the ten I gave him:):):)...

I went by my favorite bookstore, the Vagabond Bookman:):):)...and bought a copy of To Kill A Mockingbird for a friend who I was thinking about picking it up for him:):)...I don't think he's ever read it:):)...and just felt awe in the presence of all those great ideas:):):)...a great book is like communing...spending some time...in the presence of greatness:):):)...it's a great feeling:):):)...and Howard was playing Ray Charles and Louis Armstrong on the stereo today:):):)...so it was a good trip to the bookstore:):):)...

And I read Howard's beautiful hardback copy of the Farther Reaches of Human Nature...Maslow's finest contribution to the field of psychology and to humanity...and really just a collection of his last thoughts before he died:):)...

And as I was reading Maslow...I was thinking...

We've actually surpassed a lot of Maslow's vision...young people, especially:):)...young people have embraced differences in sexual lifestyles, for instance, far beyond what Maslow envisioned (it was an open question, for Maslow, whether people's interests in sado-masochism, trasvestitism, and homosexuality should be accepted...and while many people find these things kind of wierd, sometimes:):):)...homosexuality, especially, has been openly embraced by most young people, I think:):):)...and the others are definitely more part of the mainstream than in Maslow's view of Euspychia, as he called it:):):)...

And Maslow edorses punishing people as a higher B-value, I read, a little surprised, today:):):)...

So he wasn't perfect:):):)LOL:):):):):):):)...

And one of my best friends seemed to acknowledge, today, that maybe even the best of us can be assholes...God knows I can be:):):)...

And I figured out, today, that I cared more about living a life I love...than any goddamn thing that anyone could incent or punish me into:):):)...and I could give two shits about what anyone thinks about the matter:):):):):):)LOL:):):)...

And...while enjoying communing with greatness in Howard's bookstore:):):)...

I mostly just liked be with myself:):):)...just spending time on my own:):):)...just loving life:):):)...and loving the opportunities for greatness that so many of us pass up in our too short little lifetimes:):):)...so scared are we of our weaknesses...or of failing...which is an inevitable part of being great for anyone...period...no way around that one:):):)...

I walked to Borders...and was passed by my friend, Zach, a really good tier worker and loader, generally, who was fired from Amarr for...of all of the assinine reasons...because he smokes marijuana...Amarr lost a great tier worker and loader in Zach...and it serves them right for being such dicks...

And as Zach passed me...he reminded me that my now and forever name for most of the people at Amarr is not Ben...since many people don't even know my real name at Amarr...

Right on...

That's all he said...

He just yelled it from his car...

Right on:):):)...

I spent a lot of time...listening to the romantic jazz being played in various places...Howard's book store...Borders...

And wanting so badly to be in love, again:):):)...to make dinner for someone:):)...to buy exotic, beautiful flowers for someone:):)...to talk and laugh and just enjoy someone's company over wine and good food...to watch a movie, maybe...to be close with someone...and to make love passionately with someone I'm passionately in love with...someone who inspires me...someone who impresses me...someone who aspires for greatness...even as she and I may fall short of it a million times along the way:):):)...

I have a great life, I realized, today:):):)...no matter how much money...or influence...or prestige...or sex...or whatever things that could otherwise be spending my life pursuing:):):)...

And that's really all I want:):):)...

A life of freedom:):):)...and with that freedom:):):)...responsibility to make things better:):):)...

I saw that Jonathan Kozol has a new book out:):):)...The Shame of the Nation:):):)...

I kind of chuckled when I read the title:):):)...and thought:):):)...

Will the drama ever end:):):)LOL:):):)...

And then I saw that a new book about the life and wisdom of Jim Henson just came out:):):)...It Isn't Easy Being Green:):):)...

And I thought:):):)...

Now there's a book that's got stuff in it that could really improve our lives together:):):)...

I love Jim Henson, I can't even tell you:):):)...I first was inspired to consider a career writing children's books after I decided that the Muppet Movie was the gold standard of children's story-telling:):):) (if you haven't seen the original Muppet Movie, I definitely recommend it:):):)...and Grover's The Monster at the End of This Book was the subject of part of my application for my master's program at KU:):):)...and a gift from one of my best friends at the time...someone who I know reads my blog almost every day...but who I haven't heard from in quite a long time, now:):)...

Today was one of the most freeing days of my life:):):)...

And I just wanted to spend it with me:):):)...and just be:):):)...

If you haven't heard Tracy Chapman's The Promise:):):)...I highly recommend it:):):)...

I am STARVING:):):)...and I got to get something to eat:):):)...

In case anyone's wondering, though:):):)...if I know you:):):)...and I haven't told you yet:):):)...

I love you...I really do:):):)...and I hope you know that down deep:):):)...and if we haven't hugged yet:):):)...or said that to one another in person:):):)...we definitely should:):):)...I think everyone should know just how loved they are:):):)...as much as possible:):):)...

Have a great day, everyone:):):)...

Love,
Ben