This is the dumbest goddamn thing I've ever done in my life

I have no fuckin' clue why I chose education and policy as careers. It's the dumbest goddamn choices I've ever made in my life. I wanted to help people. But most people don't want help. They want someone to tell them that they're right and there's no reason to make any changes in their lives or outlooks that might threaten their outlooks or their egos.

Making money does not involve changing peoples' outlooks. It just involves making money. And everybody loves that.

I've got to get out of this bullshit work. Politics and education are two places where noone wants to make any changes that might seriously challenge them to do better. And I just don't give a shit about either of them, anymore.

Noone wants help unless it means no expended effort on their part.

And I just have no interest in that kind of work.

People are shitheads. And I just don't need the headache anymore.

Perhaps this work is a lost cause

The kids are bad. But the adults give them all the wrong messages, constantly letting them off the hook. And then pretend like it has no consequence. It's a fucked up cycle. And it is all that is available to these kids, right now.

Noone is going to make better choices when everyone is telling them that they have no choice but the mistakes they make today. You can't correct a mistake as long as everyone is trying to avoid calling it a mistake.

If people can't cut it out, maybe it is a lost cause. If we are bound and determined to avoid responsibility, maybe we'll never take it.

I don't know what then. I just know that maybe I need to find another job where I'm not constantly having people drag me two steps back for every one step forward because they just can't come to terms with their responsibility for the part they have in how things play out.

And if noone is taking responsibility, there really is no hope at all.

Mamet on politics

David Mamet has an excellent political essay at the Village Voice that I highly recommend.

David Mamet: Why I Am No Longer a "Brain-Dead Liberal"

From that essay:

"What about the role of government? Well, in the abstract, coming from my time and background, I thought it was a rather good thing, but tallying up the ledger in those things which affect me and in those things I observe, I am hard-pressed to see an instance where the intervention of the government led to much beyond sorrow.

But if the government is not to intervene, how will we, mere human beings, work it all out?

I wondered and read, and it occurred to me that I knew the answer, and here it is: We just seem to. How do I know? From experience. I referred to my own—take away the director from the staged play and what do you get? Usually a diminution of strife, a shorter rehearsal period, and a better production.

The director, generally, does not cause strife, but his or her presence impels the actors to direct (and manufacture) claims designed to appeal to Authority—that is, to set aside the original goal (staging a play for the audience) and indulge in politics, the purpose of which may be to gain status and influence outside the ostensible goal of the endeavor.

Strand unacquainted bus travelers in the middle of the night, and what do you get? A lot of bad drama, and a shake-and-bake Mayflower Compact. Each, instantly, adds what he or she can to the solution. Why? Each wants, and in fact needs, to contribute—to throw into the pot what gifts each has in order to achieve the overall goal, as well as status in the new-formed community. And so they work it out."

It is an excellent attempt to synthesize the best of liberal and conservative thought and to recount a trek that I very much relate to. I cannot really concur that Thomas Sowell is "our greatest contemporary philosopher" (Sowell is a strong mind but far too partisan a conservative and far too cynical about human nature for me to regard him as more than a strong thinker).

But other than that, this is a really excellent attempt by a brilliant liberal mind come to terms with a world where liberalism has taken a bad turn, I completely agree, has started drinking too much of its own koolaid and come up drunk with power and me with a hangover on the other side.

I love Mamet's conclusions about human nature:

"I'd observed that lust, greed, envy, sloth, and their pals are giving the world a good run for its money, but that nonetheless, people in general seem to get from day to day; and that we in the United States get from day to day under rather wonderful and privileged circumstances—that we are not and never have been the villains that some of the world and some of our citizens make us out to be, but that we are a confection of normal (greedy, lustful, duplicitous, corrupt, inspired—in short, human) individuals living under a spectacularly effective compact called the Constitution, and lucky to get it."

And that really is the bottom line. If we can learn to accept that we are normal human beings and not gods or the surrogates, we will do better and learn more thoroughly the value of being good, even as we are often tempted to do bad. Maybe being bad, at times, isn't the end of the world. And maybe doing good is served well by learning some of the lessons from our bad behavior.

It's a very interesting reflection by a thoroughly interesting and introspective thinker. Let's hope it is the brainfood for some strong theater.

Better ideas or more of the same?

I have to say that the Economist makes a convincing case for John McCain's candidacy.

Ready for round two

The question is if Democrats can put up a candidate who can answer the challenges posed by a McCain candidacy and offer better policies rather than politics more popular with the leftist base.

And, more important to me, is whether the two candidates can engage in a debate/discussion that generates better policy thinking and ideas rather than partisan showmanship. The country will be poorer for an election that fails to offer better ideas. And it will be better for the candidates who choose to offer them.