I've come to view a lot of the differences I have with the current political period as a generation gap, as much as anything else. I identify with young people. I not only do not relish getting old, I plan on doing everything I can to stay young, even as I like growing up and being more mature. For my sake, and for the sake of noone else, really, except those, kids especially, who I would like to serve better and raise better and be a better example to.
But I don't want to ever get old. I watch all these older teachers I work with and how worked up they get that their children are so much worse these days, so much less respectful, so much less, well, old, as their elders, and I can't help but think, "Haven't you ever been young in your life?"
The answer for most of them, sadly, is yes, but too long ago to really remember or appreciate the experience.
There are many exceptions to that rule, and many older teachers are really wonderful mentors to me. I have a teacher I work with, right now, Ms. Smith, who has been a really wonderful mentor and I've really loved working with her, even as we have some of these generation gap differences, as well. She works at it and I work at it and between the two of us, we learn a lot about the kids and one another.
And that's how life and relationships between older people and younger people should be. People working to get to know one another and understand one another and appreciate one another, not people trying to control one another or pressure one another or bully one another. People sharing with one another, in the all too brief time that we all have with one another.
I like maturing. A lot. I like mellowing out and having an easier and wiser life.
But I have no interest in getting old, when that means that I complain about kids these days and how much they resist when I want to put them in their place because I really know best, after all, if they could ever come to appreciate my experience and wisdom.
If you have wisdom, offer it, has always been my motto. If you have to impose it, it's probably not so wise, is my experience. And it's almost always out of an arrogance that there is no need to consult those I impose upon, anyways. And that truly is the hallmark of getting old.
I don't want to ever get old like that. Curmudgeonly and always bitter that noone will do things my way or the way I want. It is the arrogance that comes with age, I think, that I would rather leave alone.
I started journaling on-line about my life and thoughts when I was in my 30's. I envy and really appreciate all those kids who can do it for a lifetime and look back at who they were and what they were thinking and appreciate how far they and the world has come.
But no matter how far I come, I don't want to ever get old.
I want to be learning something new when I finally check out. I want to learn something profound and important just as I'm calling it quits. Either that or making love. Or maybe laying in bed with my wife. Or holding my children. Or grandchildren. Or great-grandchildren.
Maybe I could be in a college class and just kick it right there in middle of an important discussion. Or be reading or writing a book and then find my maker.
Abraham Maslow apparently had a whole slew of ideas and papers he was working on when he finally died that were collected and published in the form of one of the most brilliant books I've ever read, The Farther Reaches of Human Nature.
That's not a bad way to go. Though making love would be a pretty good way to go, too. Being in love beats writing or teaching or learning any day, anyway. And if you don't know that, it's because you haven't really been in love before.
I wonder if most older people remember what it was like to have never fallen in love before and be discovering the world in your own time, in your own way, out of your own reflections and experiences, and discovering the world for the first time?
If they don't, they should try. Because having your heart and mind open like that are the only ways to go through life and really get the most out of the experience.
Love,
Ben
