Progress...what it is...what it isn't...and why it matters...

Listening to: Toby Keith...American Soldier...

I just lost this really long, involved post on the problem of "honor killings" in Iraq and other traditional societies and why they illustrate, really well, I think, the principles of least possible necessary aggression...

And then I lost it all...ugh is a serious understatement, right now...

The essence of it is this, though...

"Honor killings" in traditional societies -- of female family members, of wives, etc. -- arise out of the various ways that social groups -- like the tribal groups featured in this NPR report -- try to coerce adherence to social taboos...and hence lead not only to repression of violations of those taboos, when they happen...which they most certainly do, we can be fully confident...if they didn't, there'd be no reason for the taboo...but they lead to destructive and dysfunctional responses to both the original taboo -- sexual obsession, in the case of sexual taboos -- but then also repressive means of dealing with those taboos...family shame...and in these very tragic cases, murder, to try to remove shame from the family...

It's all this very sad, very destructive vicious cycle and self-fullfilling prophecy that can only be broken with more openness and freedom...for us to deal with ourselves and each other as we are, for real...and get better, as a consequence...and to do so with compassion and a more developed understanding of the underlying issues involved...

More democratic, free, modern, Western, enlightened, open, humane...whatever the hell you want to call more free, democratic, and open cultures...they are stronger, as cultures and because of the strength of individuals, emotionally, intellectually, morally, and otherwise, because they deal with these issues more openly...and even they are limited in doing so by similar taboos that prevent more open discussion...but they do so better than more traditional societies because they understand such issues as part of larger matters of humanity and constructive approaches to relationships between them...

As Bruno Kirby and Billy Crystal remind us in When Harry Met Sally...

Jess: Marriages don't break up on account of infidelity. It's just a symptom that something else is wrong.
Harry Burns: Oh really? Well, that "symptom" is fucking my wife.

There's a lot more to this...but I'm tired and frustrated that I lost that post...and I have to get to bed so I can get up at a decent hour tomorrow morning...

Have a good night, everyone...

Ben