Why rules and deference to authority are bound to fail...

As I've been reflecting on my own use of authority, in the last couple of weeks...and the use of authority by folks who I trust with it more...teachers...

I think I've finally figured out why rule by authority is kind of withering away, even as it is in its last throws of demanding legitimacy...

Because authority is used -- as a rule, not as an exception -- arbitrarily...

Meaning...though the people who are charged with authority often try to use it in a way that is responsible...

As a rule...authority gets used arbitrarily...based on the moment to moment whims of those with authority...

And as more people with authority recognize that...the more, I hope and know, at some level, that they will make allowances for that fact...

But in the meantime...the recognition of this fact by those who authority is used over...which is all of us, at some level...the more people begin to ignore authority...as it becomes clear just how arbitrary its use is relative to the realities that authority is charged with governing...

Rules only work if they work...and its not their enforcement that ultimately decide if they work or not...it's the reality that we all live with...and the less they work...the more they'll be ignored...

Rules and authority are already ignored, to a great degree, by those they are imposed upon, as a rule...the real question, at this point, is whether those with authority will begin to relax their imposition...and as authority figures reflect on this, there really is only one conclusion they can come to, at some point...they have to relax their imposition...else be so out of sync with reality...to be not taken seriously at all...and people who aspire for positions of responsibility do not so aspire to not be relevant...they aspire, generally, to make a positive impact on life...and most of them know better than to believe that they can only do so with impositions of authority...in fact...so much so...that, as a rule...among those with authority...at least in the situations in which I've worked and in most democratic societies, I think...those who use authority most meticulously...are those who are least respected among their colleagues with authority...

Because it is becoming fairly clear to me...that the places where I am most effective as a teacher...are the places where I refer to my relationships with students as human beings...rather than as an authority figure...

Meaning...if I'm frustrated with how I'm being disrespected as a human being...appealing to that relationship is far more effective in dealing with the behavior than is asserting my authority...as a rule...

In situations where authority looms over me...it is so clear...it's use is often completely arbitrary to the realities I am dealing with...

And when kids appeal to me for similarly reasonable rationales...all I can say to them is...they'll have to get the issue resolved with the specific person that they dealt with at the time...I have to back up my colleauges...and in the meantime...I work with my colleagues to persuade them to relax their more arbitrary uses of authority...by demonstrating by example how doing so improves relationships with students...accomplishing more of our purposes...both in improving behavior...and in improving academic focus and accomplishment...and my class, generally, is a pretty good example of that principle...yesterday was an exception, largely because I, personally, was off my mark, feeling very ill and overwhelmed and out of energy...but as a general rule, my special education class -- where students are often, for good reason, sent for behavior problems, as well as academic problems -- is, generally, better behaved than many general education classes where students, generally, behave better of their own accord and without teachers having to remind them to do so, as much...

And I can tell that the places where I'm least effective...are the places where I have undermined that relationship with more arbitrary uses of authority that are really pretty typical for teachers...places where I'm tired of wrangling with students over their behavior...tired of reminding the same students to be more respectful of me and one another...and places where I act to get some resolution...places that are completeful forgiveable...but that prove to some students that all teachers are alike...and that they all just want to control you...which is ironic...because all teachers, on their better days, feel just the opposite...all teachers are striving to have students be responsible for their own behavior...so that teachers don't have to deal with it...and so that students can learn to be more responsible for their own behavior as they grow into young adults...

And I like most teachers and parents and adults and authority figures -- the good ones, at least -- try to reflect on this use of authority to use it less and less arbitrarily...and to still be effective in helping to raise young people...who are responsible for their own behavior and their own lives...

Only to prepare the more responsible of them...like me...for a world which is often arbitrary with its use of authority...no matter how responsible a person is...

A fact that I will just hope that authority figures in the adult world...are reflecting on, as well...

I trust that they are...

Because there is no major movement to relax rules in the adult world...

And yet...it is slowly, very slowly...happening...

Evidenced by the perceived need by the less reflective among us...to defend rules that have already been passed...

Melissa and I listened to a commercial on a Chiefs game being broadcast over the Dillons intercom system...for maintaining 21 as the drinking age...

And I'm thinking, "I don't recall any major push to remove 21 as a the drinking age"...so who are they defending the law against?...

And the reality is...that they are defending the law against all the people who are, quite reasonably, now and in the past, ignoring that law...opting, instead, to teach young people to drink moderately and responsibly with adults present...rather than undercover and less responsibly...outside of adult presence...

Quite illegal to be sure...but a very responsible decision that many parents have been making with their children for quite a long time, now...for good reason...it means more responsible drinking among young people...and parents who do it have come to terms with what parents who often live in a lot of denial around alcohol use and abuse often avoid...that the best recipe for alcohol abuse...is alcohol prohibition...and if you doubt that...go watch the children whose parents prohibit alcohol use...once their out on their own...it's generally not pretty...

The truth is...that luckily for all of us...responsible people don't stop being responsible just because the law says different...

In fact...responsible people often and regularly ignore the law to be responsible, when doing so is more responsible...

It was the foundation for the modern civil rights movement...it was the foundation for developing more freely-chosen sexual mores in the twentieth century, which, on-balance, has been a very good and responsible thing...and it is the foundation for good parenting...

And the most irresponsible fact of modern life...is that we have not squared this more responsible living...with the law...because the least responsible among us...have been busy trying to scare younger and older people, alike...into responsibility...that many of them -- I have some friends here in Lawrence I'm thinking of, right now -- don't practice themselves, so lost are they in their denial of this obvious reality...instead of having younger and older people alike...choose greater responsibility...which, today, as for most of the history of modern life, has involved not only not obeying laws, always...but often disobeying them...generally, quietly...and at times -- as with the civil rights movement -- openly...

But I'm not just advocating a more open reconciliation of this fact with the use of authority...

I'm predicting it...

I'm pretty clear, at this point, that this is the side of this question that will prevail...

Because no other conclusion would allow for as functional living by free and responsible adults...in a world of freedom and responsibility...

It is the presence and interaction with people we trust that promotes responsibility...not the more arbitrary uses of authority...

And the latter will always remain a serious dysfunction of contemporary life in free societies until and as we let it go...

And we will let it go...

Because there is no other way out of this one...

Not just as a fact of free societies...

But as a fact of life...

My greatest reassurance on this question...is that there is no other way around this one...no matter what obstacles those who resist this trend throw in its way...it is a fact of life that no political activism or wrangling will ever be able to remove...this is direction that people are taking and will take more in the coming decades...because it's the direction most conducive to their more responsible natures...and it is a fact of life that all political activism and wrangling will have to square themselves with...because there's no turning back on it...

A pretty safe prediction at this point, actually, if you ask me...

Free peoples want more freedom...as a fact of life...not just as a fact of politics...and they will and do want more, yet...

Have a great week, everyone...

Love,
Ben